Louis CK does a bit about marriage (it’s an old bit; he’s since gotten divorced, which makes the content both sad and prescient) in which he recounts his therapist’s recommendation that he take his wife on a date. “I went on a date with my wife, and you know what? I’m not going to call her again.”

My husband reminded me of this joke recently upon returning from our “vacation.”

I use quotes because, as anyone with kids knows (and some have written), any temporary relocation of the family unit would be more aptly described as a trip. I’ve been on vacations before, and they involve some combination of the following: free-flowing adult beverages, relaxed seaside dinners, aimless strolls through picturesque villages, books read cover to cover. Given these standards, the last vacation my husband and I took was our honeymoon.

This recent trip involved our family of four flying cross-country to California for the accomplishing of multiple goals (there’s another red flag–no vacation description includes the word goals), which you may cross-reference with the aforementioned list: a day at the West Coast office for my husband, meeting with a neurosurgeon for our son, my running a half-marathon (you can put running in the same quotes that enveloped vacation), and, finally, a family reunion. See any similarities with the Vacation Activities List? I didn’t think so.

We were on a trip.

Read the rest over at Mockingbird!